In response to BlogBuddy Smithankyou’s recent article on
5 Reasons Why You Are Single
I’m replying this with a version for the ladies!
When you realised you have been attending countless weddings and baby showers
splurging on angbaos for your pals by going through their entire life stages with them
Don’t you want to get back?
There are a few schools of thought:
“I Don’t Need a BoyFriend, neither do I need marriage or having to settle down and start a family… So I’m fine being happy for my friends who have chosen the extremely normal path while I want to be DIFFERENT”
“Being Single is Fabulous, I get Freedom and Options, Don’t have to commit to anything and anyone”
“I really want to be normal like my friends, but I haven’t found anyone worthy!”
“Why is it so easy for them to find a suitable partner while I have so much difficulties meeting one? I Give Up!”
Believe it or not,
Relationships and Finding the ‘ONE’ depends on the Law of Attraction
If you decide to give up on the pursuit, then it’s really gone
If you know that someone will be there for you, Don’t stop searching
If all else fails, just befriend Smithankyou coz it has been tested and proven that he brings positive ‘taohua‘ to friends around him
Not only normal taohua, but really constructively-positive ones!
Here’s my top 5 reasons for Why You are Still Single
I can honestly go on and on with this list, but let’s see this first!
1. You Believe in Love
Love occurs and Love changes with time
Love happens to the lucky few
If you think you will be that minority, then ask yourself again: Why are you still single?
For very practical reasons, you should be looking out for the ultimate companion
and NOT True Love coz by this time and age, Love has expired
How often do you meet someone that makes your heart skip a beat? [with boyband songs playing in the background]
That being said, I have really met women who fell for almost any guy who is nice to them and tells me that their heartbeat is always pounding much faster when they see the guy
They are largely mistakened – that increased pace of the heartbeat is due to them being nervous, not knowing how to behave as they are inexperienced dealing with the opposite sex
Being in your 30s, dreaming about finding LOVE is really all situated in the clouds
Look out for a compatible someone with aligned objectives in life and similar lifestyle habits
2. You Want to Fulfill Your Wishlist
By now, you should have a wishlist
It’s perfectly fine if you have no idea what you want in a man, but at the very least, you should know what you DO NOT want to have in a man
What you do not want is actually more important than what you want
In the event that you still do not have a list as you are reading this now – WRITE ONE
Pull out a piece of paper and grab a pen and start writing
When you are writing it, it helps you to better understand yourself and your needs
It can be anything from the smallest detail like I need him to be 1.75m and 70kg
or He must have hair
to the more important detail like he must have a career in the IT industry (because you like nerds maybe?)
I recall that I had more than 20 pointers on my list of my ideal partner
At the same time, I’m smart enough to know that this perfect robot may not appear
So I’m allowing some discounts for myself
It doesn’t mean that I’m settling for less, it just means that if the guy checks of 85% of my lists….
I’m closing the deal!
– Just slicing off the risks for any potential opportunity costs –
Looking to check off your list 100% is possibly the very reason why you are still single,
or if you claim that it’s a likely event to fulfill your list, I bet your list is a short and generic one
You don’t get a Zac Efron dropping off your roof for free~
3. You are a Dragon Lady
There are more ladies taking up powerful responsibilities and positions in both the workplace and households
Understandably, it is a huge conscious effort to be able to separate the attitude that you should have being at work and in your personal life
Most ladies would have common difficulties to flip their internal switch after leaving their offices
This simply reflects the level of ego and pride in the woman
Instinctively, men already have more testosterones to start with
They will never want to feel overpowered and overruled
If you think that men and women are supposed to be equal, you’re dead wrong!
It’s NEVER EQUAL
Even if it’s equal, take some effort to pretend that it’s not
It doesn’t cost you anything to make your man feel good – while you can take out your frustrations on others later on
4. You Dress to Kill
Men who said that they prefer women with no make up and it doesn’t matter if she has no fashion sense
They are LIARS
Try going out with them and see if their eyes float to a hotter one on the streets
If you believe that men should look at your inner beauty instead of superficial appearance, this is exactly why you’re single…
When it comes to love (and sex)
men are animals and they look out for the attractive opposite sex to mate
The first impression is made up of your face and your body
You only have ONE CHANCE
By the time someone checks out your inner beauty, everything inside and outside of you would have turned moldy
I’m not telling you that you should be a hot babe every single day
(though I aim to be one myself – but that is the kind of standards I set for myself)
Just be decently packaged and quit being on the fashion disaster runway
5. You like Bad Boys
Come to terms with it
We all like Bad Boys
We have an inevitable preference for men who have sexy tattoos/ah bengs/playboys/etc
It’s kind of a fun yet unreachable playground for us
But we forgot the very fact that We not only grew up, we also grew OLD
Bad Boys don’t last
If you’re thinking you have the power to change him, you may proceed to place yourself on a pedestal and allow decomposition to begin
Making Sensible Moves…
Are you putting yourself out there enough?
Are you making efforts to have conversations?
Have you been spontaneous?
Do you meet people with an open mind?